You might be from Illinois if:

You've never met any celebrities
Your idea of a traffic jam is ten cars waiting to pass a tractor on the highway
You've seen all the biggest bands ten years after they were popular
You measure distance in minutes
Down south to you means Kentucky
You know several people who have hit a deer
You have no problem spelling or pronouncing "Des Plaines"
You think Chicago is a completely different state from Illinois.
You know the answer to the question, "Is this Heaven?"
Your school classes were cancelled because of cold
Your school classes were cancelled because of heat
You know where all the Yoders live
You've ridden the school bus for an hour each way
You've ever had to switch from "heat" to "A/C" in the same day
You think ethanol makes your truck "run a lot better."
You know what's knee-high by the Fourth of July
Stores don't have bags, they have sacks
You see people wear bib overalls at funerals.
You see a car running in the parking lot at the store with no one in it no matter what time of the year.
You end your sentences with an unnecessary preposition. Example: Where's my coat at?" or "If you go to the mall I wanna go with."
All the festivals across the state are named after a fruit or vegetable
You can locate Illinois on the United States map
Detassling was your first job
You've ever been on a "Geode Hunt"
Your idea of a really great tenderloin is when the meat is twice as big as the bun and accompanied only by ketchup and a dill pickle slice
You still pronounce the "s" in Illinois.
You learn your pickup will run without a muffler
You install security lights on your house and garage and leave both unlocked
You think of the major four food groups as beef, pork, pop, and Jell-O salad with marshmallows
When asked how your trip was to any foreign, exotic place, you say, "It was different."
You consider being called a "Pork Queen" an honor
People from other states love to hear you say "Illinois" and other words with "Os" in them.
Your dream vacation is a trip to Rock Home Gardens
You carry jumper cables in your car
You drink "pop."
You know what the numbers I-80, 75 and 57 mean
You know what "cow tipping" is